What You Can Learn From a Failed Relationship

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When you break life down it wasn’t your spouse or your date. It was you.

You must be a realist. There are friends among us who do not have a moral compass. Their gossip becomes clearly an attempt to keep you from getting ahead. From creating stability love and happiness. Friends will bully you, sabotage you, steal your spouse and plot to take your job.

My religion taught me to care for others, but praying for them does not forbid me   from taking care of myself. I have seen the serpents who wreak unsavory gossip as though it is the truth. Maybe you aren’t convinced there are bad people. If you want to sit by and just hope people are going to watch out for you. I am praying you learn that people who say they have your back is a myth.  If you think I am being negative this isn’t’ for you.

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In the real world there are bad “guys” who lull us to sleep by seductive lies in order to suppress any happiness we might attain.

Have you ever been baffled by why those who are struggling in some sphere of their life deep down enjoy company?

Have you been betrayed by the people you trusted as your allies?

Have you ever lamented why you lost your husband to someone you trusted?

Whether this happened to you you can put an end to it.

You can stop being a victim.

I have often wondered what it is that make some people rude. You know what I mean.

I give the unvarnished truth. You have come to expect that from me. You can be upset with your spouse, boyfriend or boss as much as you want but that won’t change the reality that your fears are louder than your faith.

Life is boiled down to good versus evil.

Evil has always hidden in gossip which is fear.

When I wrote this blog post I had pushed my chair back temporarily depressed. My heart was broken.

Here are my truths I learned to admit to a moment ago. I cannot do you or myself justice if I am unwilling to admit the pain and relaities of being me.

I love people but not all of them.

I am trusting but not to everyone.

I love myself but not every thing about me.

I can forgive my enemies but I won;t forget their names.

I don;t like gossip whatever it’s genesis. I have learned their are people who regardless of their outward expression will never shed a tear or give a second thought for hoe they have kept you a victim.

I have learned the only way forward is to walk wide around them. They are friends. They are leaches living on your dwindling happiness that gives them strength. To overcome these leaches one has to listen why people do what they do.

My friend this evening had fallen in love with a beautiful woman. His heart ached when he learned she would not see him obver the objections of friends who had never met him. His heart was broken.

I said to him that he had to get real about how the world really works.

The bullies cloaked as friends who stealthily relish that one remain as they are; alone and afraid.

Much of what we have been told by our parents is no longer relevant. There are bad people who are only happy if you are unhappy.

You have a new world to contend with where the bad guys don’t wear black hats. The rules  and expectations for relationships don;t apply anymore. There are all kinds of people in the world from the neophytes to the street smart.

There are limits to turning the other cheek. You need a wake up call. I want you to become tough and street smart. Trust me in  the 21st century you’d better be street smart. That requires a wake up call because we become blind as to why people especially friends do what they do. We can lose sight with our obscured vision. There are people in your life who are manipulative and negative. They are obstacles to your success and peace of mind.

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I might shock you. I might horrify you. I might admit a life that would make your cringe over my courage. But there is one thing; I never lie.

We get lulled asleep becoming prone to those who subtly wreak havoc on our life so that we don;t see the clear and present dangers.

We can and do get beaten down by lonely and desperate friends who fear our happiness as much as the suited criminal.

We are told to give our fellow man a good break. To turn the other cheek.

I’m hoping you become less than an easy target from the shiny objects that come to you from the dark side.

But the darkside is cloaked. Jim

 

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Since 1987 Jim Woods has been dedicated to bringing Authentic Leadership and Rapid Change to organizations & individuals. Jim is President of InnoThink Group. A Management consulting firm located in Colorado Springs, CO. Like us on Facebook – Jim Woods Seminars

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About

Jim Woods is president of The Jim Woods Group. A management consulting firm. Go here to see his work www.jimwoodsgroup.com. He advises and speaks to organizations large and small on how to increase top line growth in times of uncertainty and complexity. Some of his speaking and consulting clients include: U.S. Army, MITRE Corporation, Pitney Bowes, Whirlpool, and 3M. See more at his website www.jimwoodsgroup.com.

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Posted in Adversity, Personal Achievement, Relationships

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