Last night I happened to read on CNN of an educated woman from a good family who had received the dubious distinction of being one of the most famous entities on a porn site. She was an attractive young woman who had graduated from a well-known university. She was also raised in a religious home where she knew she had brought embarrassment. I was equally surprised that she was not the only one. Please share below
Why is this important when we can do as we please? These educated women could have easily earned the money from porn in their careers. Moreover life exiting the porn industry is never the same again. So, what would compel countless women to do so?
Self worth. While this sounds elementary, who else would place themselves in a predatory industry knowingly demeaning women? Free speech? There are long term consequences to our actions. Freedom of expression does not disallow the consequences of our choices. If I may a man on YouTube expressed his dislike for people of Asians. He was determined to express his hatred.
I was compelled to emphasize this: “That hatred is indicative of a diminishing self-worth. Confidence in the right places. Such as the women above.
Below are a few ideas on confidence from ZenHabits:
Our self-image means so much to us, more than we often realize. We have a mental picture of ourselves, and it determines how confident we are in ourselves. But this picture isn’t fixed and immutable. You can change it. Use your mental Photoshopping skills, and work on your self-image. If it’s not a very good one, change it. Figure out why you see yourself that way, and find a way to fix it.
4. Think positive. One of the things I learned when I started running, about two years ago, what how to replace negative thoughts (see next item) with positive ones. How I can actually change my thoughts, and by doing so make great things happened. With this tiny little skill, I was able to train for and run a marathon within a year. It sounds so trite, so Norman Vincent Peale, but my goodness this works. Seriously. Try it if you haven’t.
5. Kill negative thoughts. Goes hand-in-hand with the above item, but it’s so important that I made it a separate item. You have to learn to be aware of your self-talk, the thoughts you have about yourself and what you’re doing. When I was running, sometimes my mind would start to say, “This is too hard. I want to stop and go watch TV.” Well, I soon learned to recognize this negative self-talk, and soon I learned a trick that changed everything in my life: I would imagine that a negative thought was a bug, and I would vigilantly be on the lookout for these bugs. When I caught one, I would stomp on it (mentally of course) and squash it. Kill it dead. Then replace it with a positive one. (“C’mon, I can do this! Only one mile left!”)
via zen habits.
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Jim Woods is a competitive strategy and talent and organization specialist and founder of InnoThink Group a management consulting firm located in Colorado Springs, CO. where he serves as president. His firm contracts with experienced consultants from firms such as Bain, Accenture and Mckinsey.
Jim has worked with Fortune 500 firms, US military and non-profits. He brings a unique background of business, interpersonal skills, experience, to each of his consulting, speaking and coaching engagements. He is a sought after speaker on strategic leaders, competitive strategy, innovation, team building, employee engagement and uncertainty. To contact Jim for an engagement contact him at his website. Click here.